Autism isn’t a tragedy or a puzzle to solve—but the myths and misunderstandings? Oh, they’re everywhere.
So here’s what I wish more people actually knew about autism—especially before offering me unsolicited parenting advice in the checkout line at Target.
1. Autism Is Not a Tragedy—Bad Attitudes Are.
Raising an autistic child has challenges—so does raising any child. (Ever met a toddler on a nap strike?)
But my child is not a walking “What Could Have Been” story. He is brilliant, joyful, and loves deeply—even if that love looks different than what you expect. He doesn’t say “I love you” with words, but he does by pressing his forehead against mine or pulling me in for the world’s coziest snuggle.
The real struggle? Low expectations. If you assume autistic people can’t thrive, that says more about you than them.
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2. The “Autism Spectrum” Is Not a Straight Line.
Autism isn’t a straight line from 'a little autistic' to 'very autistic'—it’s a color wheel of strengths and challenges that look different for everyone.
A person might struggle with one thing (like verbal communication) while absolutely excelling at another (like noticing details others miss). And abilities can change day to day—so that thing my child did yesterday? He might not be able to do it today, and that’s okay.
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3. Stimming Is Not a Problem—Unless You Make It One.
Hand-flapping? Rocking? Humming? Repeating words or sounds? That’s called stimming, and it’s awesome.
Stimming helps autistic people regulate emotions, focus, and process the world. It’s how my child manages excitement, stress, and the world around him.
If you’re bothered by a kid flapping their hands with joy, but not by Chad screaming at the TV during an Eagles game, maybe rethink your stance on “acceptable public behavior.”
| Design by rachael benion |
4. If You Wouldn’t Say It About a Non-Autistic Kid, Don’t Say It About Mine.
If you wouldn’t tell a parent of a neurotypical child “Wow, it must be so hard to raise a kid like that”, then don’t say it to me either.
Also, let’s retire:
🚫 “He doesn’t look autistic.” (Oh? What’s autistic supposed to look like? A glow-in-the-dark cape and a sign?)
🚫 “I could never do what you do.” (Cool, but I don’t have an escape hatch, so we’re making it work.)
🚫 “Have you tried essential oils?” (Unless they are essential to my survival in the form of coffee, the answer is no.)
5. Autism Is Not Caused by Bad Parenting, Vaccines, or Mercury Retrograde.
If I had a dollar for every time someone blamed autism on something unrelated, I’d be fully funding accessibility programs by now.
Autism is neurological, genetic, and not caused by screen time, gluten, or the phases of the moon.
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6. Autistic Kids Aren’t “Too Old” for Their Favorite Things.
Oh, you think my child should grow out of his love for stacking blocks or watching the same episode of Bluey 400 times? That’s adorable. Let me introduce you to the concept of joy.
Autistic people (and honestly, all people) find comfort in their interests. If something makes my child happy, he gets to enjoy it. The world is overwhelming—let people have their thing.
(Also, you’re telling me this while wearing a football jersey with another grown man’s name on it. Make it make sense.)
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7. Awareness Is the Floor. Acceptance Is the Goal.
People know autism exists. But awareness isn’t enough. Acceptance is where the real change happens.
Acceptance means:
✅ Not just making space for autistic people, but making sure they belong.
✅ Accommodations that don’t feel like inconveniences, but obvious necessities.
✅ Understanding that different doesn’t mean wrong.
Autistic people don’t need to be “fixed” or molded into something they’re not. The world needs to adjust—not them.
My Child Belongs in This World—Exactly As He Is.
Autism isn’t something to cure, fear, or mourn. My child is not a problem to be solved—he is a person to be understood, supported, and celebrated.
And if the world can’t see that? That’s the world’s problem to fix.
And I’ll keep advocating until it does.
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On May 3rd, 2025, Rhys will be walking in Neurodiverse Network's May Mile to support neurodivergent families, we’d love for you to consider a $5 donation here. https://givebutter.com/MayMile25/rhys GO TEAM RHYS!!!!
When visiting events and local businesses, be sure to tell them Macaroni KID sent you... and don't forget to tell all your friends!
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